Z.Monkey’s Blog

So Heidi pointed out this album to me because I was much amused by the music in Life Aquatic. I am sure that those who know me realize that I like this album because it is basically a collection of damn good Bowie covers. I like Bowie. I like damn good covers. What can you do?

For those who have seen the Life Aquatic you know the music I am talking about, for those who have not seen it many of the songs are popular David Bowie songs sung in Portugese with an acoustic guitar acomp, accomn, acompnt… a guy on the guitar. That’s it. Tis Good.

You may recall that I am taking a course that is supposed to improve the way I supervise peoples. In case you do not, look here. Today (now yesterday) was the second installment of this course. Like I may have said before I feel that writing about this course will make the shit talked about stick in my head. So I feel justified in writing about it at work. I’ll try to make this quick and painful… -less, -LESS!.

The day was divided into two parts (1) the hiring process (screening candidates, interviewing, not discriminating) and (2) reviewing employee performance. Each will be addressed separately.

Now the first half of the day (1) was pretty straight forward but useful. The whole time I was like, ‘yeah that makes sense’ or ‘I guess I kind of knew that’. One of the main things I learned was to create a matrix or table with all candidate and all desired skills (not education though because you cannot require education because it discriminates against Bill Gates). This makes it easier to compare each candidate and protects you from discrimination lawsuits… unless, of course, you do discriminate, at which point I would recommend burning the paper. The matrix technique can be used for both choosing people to interview and choosing the person to hire. Then you interview the person. You should come in prepared (holy shit!) with questions designed to get specific past examples of the skills you want in the employee. Basically the idea is that past performance will probably tell you a lot about future performance (i.e. if you were a dickhead, you will probably stay a dickhead). We were also give a list of questions that were discriminatory and a second list of questions that were not, so that we wouldn’t ask stupid things like, ‘Do you have children who will hinder you from working hideous amounts of overtime?’. There was a video! Finally, save all paperwork involved, including notes on candidates; if you are sued you have to prove that you didn’t discriminate. (In case you were wondering much of the morning was spent on possible ways to discriminate, which is the reason it kept coming up in this paragraph.)

Then the second half of the day (2) was given to a topic that I know nothing about. Reviewing people’s performances. I have never really been reviewed and I have never reviewed anyone. Some people would say that this is a good thing as it means I will not get fired and will not have to fire anyone, but that’s crap. Firing is a long process which has to be documented (verbal, written, probation, termination! or something). The review is supposed to give the employee an idea of where to go based on how they have performed in the past. In this section they talk about employees need clear job descriptions, clear goals, and a clear way of evaluation. Once this is in place reviewing should be easy because you can say, ‘According to this predefined system you are an idiot. How do you think we can remedy this?’ Now, during this entire section I was a little perturbed. I do not have a clear job description… hell I wrote my job description and I did not know what I was getting myself into! I do not have any really goals; I cannot make goals for myself (ask Heidi) and no one here will make them for me. Plus there is no evaluation system here. I do not know if I am doing what is expected of me or not. Then I realized that I am doing the same thing to the people who work under me. Great. How to fix that? Come up with a clear job description. Keep tabs on how everyone is doing (good work, bad stuff, project ongoing and completed, testing proficiency, e&c). Anything else?

During both an interview and a review it is possible to have some difficult situations so remember this: you are in charge and you are right so own everything you say (’I think you are a dickhead’), and ask open-ended questions that get specific answer or force the employee to come up with the solution. Basically, lead the employee into saying what you want them to say, that way they have to agree with you. Manipulation! Use your hands!

P.S. I am attempting to use a trackback. Wish me luck!
P.P.S. I hope that I can continue to amuse Dan with my inane ramblings.
P.P.P.S. Is the login thing really killing all the comments? Let me know by phone if necessary.
P.P.P.P.S. I didn’t really read through this and I stopped to have a conversation during it so forgive any bad grammah.
P.P.P.P.P.S. Sorry for the dearth of links.

To make a long story short, and avoid getting into any details, one of the guys I work with is a massive asshole. And him having a pighead made my Friday afternoon less than wonderful. I dislike people who believe they are (1) better than everyone else, (2) insult everyone around them while trying to prove it, and (3) get insulted when you do not stroke their Ego.

I just finished reading through
the first part of Marcel Proust In Search of Lost Time, Combray (Found
in the book Swann’s Way). When I
originally found the book wandering through the not so local bookstore; I was
struck by the opening couple of pages during which the Proust describes falling
asleep while reading. The topic is
completely mundane but the style is exquisitely detailed. “Sometimes, my candle scarcely out, my eyes
would close so quickly that I did not have time to say to myself ‘I’m falling
asleep.’ And, half an hour later, the thought that it was time to try to sleep
would wake me up…” (p. 1) This sums up
the work: mundane and exquisite.

The story of Combray revolves
around the narrator’s childhood in the title town of Combray. We learn about his mother, father,
grandmother, aunt and cousins, and some of their neighbors. But the story is not what makes the book
stick in ones mind; rather it is the fluidity of the author’s style. He jumps from one topic to another, as if he
were leaping from one Lilly-pad to another chasing the light as it sparkles
across the surface of a pond. The
slightest sense releases a memory that changes the direction of the story. There is the last section of Part I of
Combray (a part that Lydia Davis, translator and introducer, would call
quintessential Proust) when the taste of madeleine (cake) in tea stimulates the
narrator’s memory. But it is just a
feeling that there is something hidden beneath the surface; after battling to
restore it, the memory only returns after the narrator surrenders. The memory is of Combray, of which we soon
learn a great deal. (pp. 46 & 47)

But the story is not about
Combray rather it is about the narrator as a boy. We do not learn about this hypochondriac aunt but how he
perceives her (and her madeleine). We
do not learn about the road to Guermantes but how the river and flowers found
at its side inspire his imagination.
Everything in the town reflects the boy and is exaggerated by the boy’s
limited scope; his aunt has always been bedridden, and the town of Guermantes
exists in name only for he has never followed it to its end. His is a child’s view of the world. Everything is small; everything is
personal. The reader is not required to
question why things are, why his grandmother walks in the rain or why the
family eats lunch early on Saturday.
Things are as they are and one only has to look around to find beauty
and comfort.

Though not everything is
comfortable for the boy. There is also
the irrational fear that comes over him every night, when he wonders if his
mother will kiss him goodnight. If she
did not come he would lay away starring at the images the night-light would
project on the wall. All goodness and
happiness would vanish from his world. But
this fear is relegated to the darkness, and vanquishes with the sun every
morning.

The book also appeals to on a
more personal level for I feel there seems to be a kinship between the author
and myself. In one section the boy
fantasizes about meeting a noblewoman and being brought to her court, but he
dream is incomplete:

She would make me
tell her the subjects of the poems that I intended to compose. And these dreams warned me that since wanted
to be a writer someday, it was time to find out what I meant to write. But as soon as I asked myself this, trying
to find a subject in which I could anchor some infinite philosophical meaning,
my mind would stop functioning, I could no longer see anything but empty space before
my attentive eyes, I felt that I had no talent or perhaps a disease of the
brain kept it from being born. (pp. 176 & 177)

The frustration that, when it
comes to important things (at least personally) there is no vision, no driving
force outside of a desire to be good at something. Quite often, while reading this book, I would find myself
relating authors meandering mind to my own.

This is one of the strong points
of the work. It forces ones own mind to
wander. Reading this book is like
falling asleep while reading. As you
read through the pages you mind wanders and you create your own version of
Proust’s world with you at its center.
You find yourself rereading sections not just because the style is so
captivating but the memories that bubble forth while reading them send your
mind elsewhere. This work is a reminiscence for both the author and the
reader.

“The irony is the very expectation of getting more done is getting in the way of getting more done,” he said. “People are stressed out.” From Tech makes working harder, not easier.

A link to the article, which I found on /.. I do not know if these higher expectations are being driven by new technology or if management in general has become as incompetent as the Bush administration, Enron, WorldCom and the like have made us believe. I remember in the OB class that I never finished the term ‘Do more with less’ was thrown around quite a bit. We should do things for people not to make money.

An amusing little aside. Found the link here.

Down with dancing with the stars! No… I don’t really care. Not much to say but I figured I’d try to keep up my personal wager. I think that I am going to write something more profound but I doubt I’ll finish it today. We’ll see.

It seems that Doomface is having trouble selecting a color scheme so how about this? I heard that you like light red.

I’ll be taking a couple of days off next week (Heidi and I were going to go up to Canada or something but she is starting her new job ). I guess I could just go to work but screw that… Doomface has inspired me much as Maletas once did.